The Time I Thought I Was Going to Become an Orphan, but Instead Got Interrogated About a Crime

Growing up, I would definitely say I was sheltered, but that changed pretty quickly when a new family moved into the Lintons' old house. I don't remember much about them, except that my golden retriever, Sam, invited himself to their son's fifth birthday party. He then proceeded to massacre a pack of newborn wiener dogs … Continue reading The Time I Thought I Was Going to Become an Orphan, but Instead Got Interrogated About a Crime

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Part Two of My Date From Hell: Royals

On the way to Laguna, I looked out the window as my roommate drove past the cheap, Hawaiian-themed bar the DILF and I spent some time at before any of the knife wielding, teeth clenching, crazy eyes stuff happened. It was there that we drank Lupa Lupas and got into an actual argument about what era … Continue reading Part Two of My Date From Hell: Royals